Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Why I Think You Should Drive a Stick

a. For starters you will get 2-3 miles per gallon more than your automatic transmission gets you. Don't you snicker, you will wish you had listened to me when gas prices hit the 6 $ /gallon mark.

b. Your right hand will be perpetually stuck to the stick while driving thereby keeping you out of trouble. A busy right hand might itch to pick up the phone while driving at 80 mph on the expressway, but then itchy right hand will soon learn from practice that it is not a great idea. By induction the hyperactivity right hand will also desist from doing any of the following while driving:

  • shaving
  • putting on makeup
  • trying to rummage through hand bag
  • eating a muffin or cleaning up the mess created after eating it
  • picking out favourite CD from among 100 CD's in the glove compartment
  • the not so friendly gesturing at fellow drivers

c.You will imbibe the virtues of self control and resist the temptation of inching closer to the car in front when waiting for the light on a roadway inclined at 45 degrees to the horizontal. Why??Well stick's tend to follow the laws of gravity and go back a wee bit when the brake is released.

d. Your foot will get good exercise whenever you are stuck in traffic. Women, you will finally have those to-die-for-toned legs without much effort.

e. If your daily commute usually involves 30 mins or more of driving at a snail's speed then you will soon develop excruciating aches and pains from over exercise and pray to the God's above for release. And then one day unable to bear it anymore you will just give up and start utilising public transit

f. A combination of a and e will make those left wing, tree hugging environmentalists happy ( not that you care two hoots for them!!). But your soul will rest in peace knowing that even though you share your private space with some obnoxious sub human on the bus daily, your progeny and their progeny will get to smell the flowers for years to come.

g. You will remain eternally grateful to me if you suddenly win the 10 million dollar lottery and wisely decide to invest some of it in a Porsche.

h. If you are a guy who feels that slight twinge of envy on entering the weight room of your gym listen up. Your world will suddenly change once you learn how to drive a stick. Behind the wheels of your car as you deftly change gears and go into overdrive you will slowly transform from a wimpy nobody to a confident somebody. The men around you will be impressed (and the women ...well lets face it, unless you are driving a Porsche it will not make any difference to them!!)

i. And at last you will be in the same elite league as yours truly

4 comments:

Ultra Toast Mosha God said...

Driving stick/manual shift is a far superior means of car control. It mean you can find the car/bikes powerband without relying on the damn mechanics of some idiot gearbox to do it for you.

If you're piling into slow corners at high speed, you can knock it down a gear and use the engine to brake.

If you want to rocket past that pickled granny in the 2CV in front, you can drop it a gear and gun it without relying on the sluggish autonmatic gearbox that blights so many vehicles.

Case closed

Sagnik Nandy said...

i drive a stick too.
treat??? :)

Ayush said...

yeah yeah, a free right hand is very very dangerous especially if you have someone cute on the passenger seat! So stick-shift by all means that we may not shift stick.

Anyesha said...

UTMG: Good,good thanks so much for sensible reasons for driving a stick. Oh and thanks for stopping by too.

Sagnik: Old habits die hard no!!

Ayush:OMg, you just made me realise that I have been missing out on some TLC on the freeway.