This one is for my friend Anoop; so here is a list of things that really annoy me:
1. The poetic license that manufacturer's of organic products seem to have which enables them to wax eloquently about the sun, moon, the gentle breeze kissing distant shores etc. etc on boxes of cereals, chips and what and what nots. Heck chips are not good for you, even if its organic and singing love songs to the organically grown corn crop will not make the chip a health food, it will just be the organic version of junk. And btw I pay more because organic food is good for the environment, not because my food had a good life before it met its end at the processing factory.
2. Middle aged people who stalk you in the frozen section aisle of the grocery store to lecture you on the benefits of joining Quickstar.
3. Self appointed brand ambassadors for India...beware at the slightest of instigations your Friendly Neighbourhood Desi (FND) will have a tendency to start mouthing things like :
a. Indians love the cow and so they will not touch beef.
b. Indian marriages do not end in divorce because they are arranged.
c. Indians don't have sex (wonder where all the babies come from!!)!! nor do they turn gay!!!
d. Indian wives cook for their husbands.
e. Indians invented the zero( this is where all conversations usually stop).
f. We Indians have an history that goes back thousands of years ( the ultimate dig!!).
And all these statements or variations thereof are usually combined with an "unlike you Americans" at some stage. If America is so horribly decadent why don't we all just stay put in our little villages and cook rice in earthern pots (the old fashioned way) and eat with our hands and feel wonderfully self righteous about it??
4. Good boys and girls. Good boys and girls don't drink, don't smoke, don't swear, don't sweat, they wear ironed clothes and have clean rooms, they go to bed early and wake up early and also tend to moralise a little too much . They make very good FND's.
5. Ty on Extreme Makeover- The Reality Show
6. Health freaks. I love my 45 minutes in the gym but I don't want to have a two hour conversation about which exercise machine to use for which set of muscles in my toes.
7. Gadget freaks...exactly how many 72" plasma screens do you need to watch your crappy reality TV show? Note : These people are very different from the cool, nerdy types who discuss stuff like this.
So much for today.Will think of some more spiteful, annoying things and post them later.